OKay *grins* First things first. I love the idea behind this...the notion of thinking and how its Hughes job but it oftens comes back to bite him. That he is trained to think but sometimes he really, really doesn't want to.
Hmmm, I love that latter half the best. It flowed a lot better than the first half that seemed a little...passive? Maybe a little reworking the sentence structure is all that's needed and removing a few 'that' would do a trick.
But I loved and adored the ending. That was sheer brilliance.
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2005-06-14 12:26 pm (UTC)Hmmm, I love that latter half the best. It flowed a lot better than the first half that seemed a little...passive? Maybe a little reworking the sentence structure is all that's needed and removing a few 'that' would do a trick.
But I loved and adored the ending. That was sheer brilliance.